my on/off friend

he came back. just like my sis predict - he wouldnt have the guts to push me away from his life.

he called my sis first, tapi she didnt entertain him. so he called the house phone which i happend to pick up. darn i didnt recognise his voice.

haha, ni dah macam drama. i dont know whether he can enter back into my life after he made the exit himself. die yg kate : there shouldnt anything going on between us. not even friends.
durh...whut do i have to say. org tak nak kawan ngan kite, not my fault. and from the phone conversation i had with him...he made it sounded like there is nothing going on before this. mann this is tough. how can u pretend it is ok when it is not??? i mean, u put things that way, and do u think it is easy to put it straight one more time? im not sure either. i dont have the heart to treat him that way after all that we've been thru, it is hard to just not be friends. and he wants to go out with me some time...err....

gosh u might be wondering ape ni farisa cerite. lol :P ringkasnye:
it goes like this...i know this guy in high school, when i was at the tender age of 13. i guess since i was from an all girls school during primary years, i got close to guys senang skit. selak..gediks kot?? huhu. well, that is not the case here :D

then, tah nape i like him. and somehow he likes me too. but being me, i was not even serious. plus he is 3 yrs older. durh-uh. in form 3 die dah habes skolah pon. then some konflik happened which i dont recall, and so i dont like him anymore. plus i feel so distant from him, considering he was in form 5 and i was in form 2. then one bright sunny day, i decided takyah la suke mamat ni dah. i should move on. i told him that and i think he decided the same way too. and so there it goes. we dont have anything more.

later..still in form 2, he says...why dont we be friends. im totally ok with that. ape salah kan?? kawan je macam biasa. then again mishap strikes in form 3. this time mmg teruk. he called me and told me "i dont want to be friends with u anymore, dont call me or whutever. we are done"
i know why he acted that way. he got to know smthing bout me that he doesnt like. fine, if u cant accept whut i did and so forth, so be it. seriously, i dont even want to be his friend kalau perangai skit2 merajuk.

just as i was about to take my pmr, he called AGAIN for apology. this time, he used my classmate to get to me. durh!! my friend ingat die kawan ikhlas, rupenye ade udang sebalik batu. giler mad minah tuh. tapi, being a GOOD person (hahahah), i accepted his apology. lagipon sampai bile nak marah kann...

pastu saye kawan je la ngan die. form 4 die dok sibuk ckp "farisa, i still like u". whutever la mamat. smpai gurl lain yg ske kat die pon dok sibuk 'berkenalan' ngan saye. whutever. i dont really pay attention. byk lagi keje dowh.

then something happen...which i cant say it here cos it doesnt involve me. tapi mamat tu ade la. so it is not my consent to tell. lol :P
but the thing that happened doesnt realli affect me. im cool. tak kisah pon. he is still my friend. i would treat him as one.

and as i thought i got him over with his merajuk-ness attitude...he sent me an email when i was in canada saying he doesnt want to be friends with me anymore cos of the i-cant-mention-thing-above. humm fine, cos that person is related to me...im paying the cost now. im losing a friend. well, that is not new. our friendship has been on and off. whutever. it sounds too childish to me by now.

hahahaha...this is not ringkas. but yea, u get the idea aite. i dont know how i should treat him now. mcm weird. die dah banyak kali tak nak kawan with me. am i too kind hearted to accept him back all the time he says sorry?? talk to him mcm all the things that happened in the past are all sweet ones. i was digging my old letters just now. and i saw his raya card. card yg dah 4 yrs i guess. man, at that time we were so happy. tapi biar la time tells ok...

right now, im flowing with the current. kalau die nak kawan, kawan lah. if someday he decided not to. im cool.... . . . . .. .