Later for that

Before anything, tadaaaa, how do u like my new header??
The pictures pretty much sum up who I am.
What can u tell about me when u see those pictures? I say, if u know me very well, u can answer that question rather easily.

I'm planning on changing my background as well, but as of now I can't find one that I like yet. U gotta bet that I'm the MOST indecisive person ev.er. and in consistent for that matter too! I changed my header so many times already, and yet, I hardly post anything~

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I'm not gonna pretend that I'm still that young kid that does not have to worry anything "too serious", I actually have to start thinking about responsibility of being an "actual adult". I still want to live my la-la-la land and just push away any serious decision. Later I know, it gets back to me sooner than I thought.
I was awaken today by my cousin. She said, I got to know some stuff because I'm the eldest in my family. That hits me big time. Yes, I'm the eldest, and so, I bear that first child responsibility that I bet millions others are bearing as well. Little that I know, that is serious biz. I was so happy talking to her that I dont realise it at that moment. Since the conversation minutes ago, it got me. I'm actually an adult and I have to know so many things, and decide on so many things. I may not have to do it now, but it is not that painful to start think about it. Life has a way to just spring to u unexpected decisions, questions and d.ra.ma. I do not wanna be a naive grown up that thinks she've seen a lot that she knows how to make sense of everything. It is not a huge dilemma, but I'm still trying to find myself. Who am I? What defines me?

I thought I've found my place in this world, but given the 21 years I was in it, I may not even have left any markings yet, not even a tiny one. The real question is, where do u find all the answers to such questions? I simply think u can't. Please don't tell me, it's up to me to find it. It is very cliche, and I hate repetitive things. I wrote, in my other diary, what defines me...and I came up with just 2 things, mainly what I enjoy doing. Err...that does not go so well. Maybe somebody can describe me, either positive or negative. I can take it. Grass is not always greener over the other side. I totally got it if somebody is holding a grunge on me. But if they do, not like they gonna read my blog eh?

*Sigh*

I'm gonna leave my so deep inner thoughts just like that. hah. Talking bout responsibility....lol.
Honestly, I'm not ready for that yet... there will be a time where I will ready. U'll see. I'll make the announcement.. haha

Well, happy holidays y'all. Hopefully I'll come back with so many nice pictures and show them to u!